What to do if you think you are being stalked?
Recently, I was asked for advice from a course participant who is a university student, on dealing with a stalking issue.
They had reported the issue to security but were told they couldn't do anything as the 'stalker' hadn't done anything... This is entirely wrong!
First of All, Trust Your Instincts:
If you feel like you're being stalked, it's important to trust your gut feeling. Your instincts are a powerful tool in recognising when something isn't right. This can be a frightening and lonely experience, but there are actions you can take will make a difference,
Get Support:
Tell friends, colleagues, and support staff about your concerns. They can monitor the situation, act as a witnesses and be with you whenever possible.
Emergency Code/Message:
Establish a code or message that you can say or send to someone to let them know you need help. Use location sharing or security apps so you can let people know where you are.
Document Everything:
Keep a record of all interactions, no matter how small they may seem. Log them, take photos (discreetly), and gather any evidence you can.
Police..Stalking is a Crime
Remember stalking is a crime, you DO NOT have to wait for someone to try to hurt you. Report the issue to the police, remember you may need to make a number of reports. the more proof you have and support from others the better.
Understanding University Policies:
Familiarize yourself with the university's policies on stalking, intimidation, and bullying. These policies set the standards you can hold the institution accountable to. Many individuals are not fully aware of these policies, so understanding them is key.
Communicate with University Security:
Report the issue to security in person and in writing. Let them know you understand the official policies on harassment and ensure they do too! So not accept being told ‘they have done anything’. Stalking in itself is a crime.
Engage with Student Bodies:
Reach out to the student union and student welfare services. They can be a great resource in times like these. Also, consider accessing student counselling services for additional support.
Escalation If Necessary:
If you're not receiving the support you need, don't hesitate to escalate the matter up the chain. Document all your communications and the responses you receive, and copy the documentation as you escalate.
It's a sad fact that some people will not take your issues seriously or delay in responding. You need to ensure they understand that their failure to act will have repercussions for them.
Securing Your Room:
Sure, you can improve the security of your room by installing a door camera and possibly an internal camera. You can choose when to have them turned on.
Additionally, consider using a door block for added safety. You can find some options HERE:
https://www.amazon.co.uk/
Always make sure to keep your phone charged. It may also be helpful to have a spare or old phone in your room that is always available. Remember you do not need full active credit to call. the police.
Self-Defence..Act like your own bodyguard
Always have a safety plan when you are moving about.
Where possible, be with others.
Always be aware of your environment.
Carry a torch if you are out at night.
Monitor your 10m perimeter when travelling.
Look out for doorways/laneways around which a predator could lurk.
Never let someone you know know within 3-4 feet without your permission
Always act on your gut feelings
Always seek to escape
Act in your own defence if necessary, ensuring your focus is to escape
Final Thoughts:
Trust yourself, and don't hesitate to demand action and support from the university. Remember the act of stalking is a crime and can be reported to the police.
Predators thrive on fear and isolation
If the standards aren't met, or if the university lacks proper policies, highlight this,. Keep seeking higher levels of support and document all responses. Your safety and peace of mind are paramount. Ensure you get support from all friends, colleagues, and agencies.
Remember, you have the right to feel safe and secure, but you have to act to ensure it, it's your life and safety and you need to be determined to protect yourself
You cannot wait for Final proof ..because it is harm